Today An interview with Jimmy Neutron!
by TheSpiral
Summary: What would happen if some hyper teenager eating sugar decided to write an interview with Jimmy Neutron? Chapter 7 Up.. THANKS FOR YOUR REVIEWS EVERYONE!
1. Jimmy

Disclaimer: Don't own Jimmy Neutron, don't sue me, you won't get much, yadda yadda yadda…

An interview with… Jimmy Neutron!

Spiral: Hi, and welcome to today's show. With us today is the famous Jimmy Neutron from Retroville… (silence in the audience)

Spiral: And he brought his dog Goddard as well! (audience starts cheering)

Spiral: (when cheering has died down) Anyway, howdy to you Jimmy, thanks for taking the time to join us today.

Jimmy: Did… Did you just say "Howdy"?

Spiral: Um… *looks at cue guy*

*cue guy person shrugs shoulders*

Spiral: Um… Anyway, first question, to… Jimmy, (audience groans) how did you come up with the idea of shaping your hair like a large acorn?

Jimmy: _ MY HAIR DOES NOT LOOK LIKE A LARGE ACORN!

Spiral: ^_^;; I can see we're rather… Sensitive, on this matter… Anything to say Goddard? (audience cheers)

Goddard: (comes up on screen which is read out by mechanical voice) When Jimmy was younger, he was often bullied, being so smart and all, and saw some squirrels up in a tree. They all seemed to get on really well together, he thought, so he wanted to tempt them down to play with him, so he shaped his hair like and acorn. End of story. 

Spiral: ^_^;;; OK, that guy has serious issues… And how long has his hair been like that?

Goddard: Three years?

Jimmy: OK, that's it! No extra-crunchy lug nuts for YOU tonight. *sulks*

Goddard: Aww… *whimpering puppy mood*

Goddard: *turns on puppy dog eyes*

Jimmy: Must… Not… @_@

Goddard: I feel weally sad that I don't get my extra crunchy lug nuts.

Jimmy: AH! Just have them! *throws lug nuts on the floor*

Goddard: And the mechanical dog wins round 312335454356 *ten minutes later* 17857.

Spiral: @_@

Jimmy: *asleep in chair*

Spiral: *jerks out of it* Anyway, where were we? Oh yeah… Jimmy, in the episode where you created the love potion *sweat drop from Jimmy and blushing* do you think you would have thrown up if you had actually kissed Cindy? 

Jimmy: Umm… Yeah! Of course I would… 

Spiral: Are you SURE about that? 

Jimmy: _

Goddard: *opens mouth and Jimmy's voice starts speaking* night watch, day 42 *projects image of Jimmy asleep in bed* 

Jimmy: *in projection in sleep* Cindy. No, don't touch that… It will BOOM! Yeah… Yah yah… Me lovey biiiiiiiiiiiiiiirds appppeeeeeeeeeeear… Go… Away… No! Come back! Cindy, not you! NO! You'll never take her alive! You'll have to get through me! AH! *screams* 

Jimmy: *wakes up in projection* *rubs eyes* Wha? Goddard! Sleep mode! Gr… Stupid dog…

*end projection*

Jimmy: *gets screwdriver and de-activates Goddard*

Audience: Aww!

Spiral: ^_^; So, Jimmy, what are your.. Um… Views on…Um…

Some random person in the audience: CINDY!

Spiral: Yes, what are your views on Cindy.

Jimmy: Who's Cindy? What's Cindy? I don't know any Cindy! *blushing*

Spiral: *one eyebrow raised* Cindy… Vortex? 

Jimmy: Oooh… Her. She's just annoying. 

Spiral: Are you sure?

Jimmy: Yes

Spiral: Are you sure, sure?

Jimmy: Yes…

Spiral: Are you absolutely sure?

Jimmy: YES!

Spiral: If you don't like her then why are you getting so wound up? 

Jimmy: ;;_;; Because you're annoying me.

Spiral: Am I?

Jimmy: Yes

Spiral: Really, am I?

Jimmy: Yes…

Spiral: Really?

Jimmy: FOR THE LAST TIME YES!

Spiral: Oh… Sorry… Do you forgive me?

Jimmy: Yes- hey wait… SHUT UP!

Spiral: OK… *sits and looks at cue cards for a long time without saying anything*

Jimmy: Umm… You can say something now if you want…

Spiral: YAY!

Jimmy: ^_^;;

Spiral: Anyway, it's Cindy's birthday coming up soon, (A/N: I know it probably isn't, I'm just saying this to make conversation) are you gonna get her a present?

Jimmy: No, why would I?

Spiral: Aww… Why not?

Jimmy: Because I don't like her

Spiral: She likes you

Jimmy: Are you supposed to be imitating cupid?

Spiral: No, I'm just reading these cue cards, anyway, why aren't you gonna get her a present?

Jimmy: No!

Spiral: Seriously, she DOES like you.

Jimmy: ¬_¬

Spiral: she DOES!

Jimmy: OK, if you're so convinced, I would like to see some data to support this hypothesis.

Spiral: Umm… OK…

Jimmy: Well…

Spiral: Well, you know the incident involving the love po-

Jimmy: Shut up.

Spiral: The love po-

Jimmy: Shut up!

Spiral: The love potion!

Jimmy: JUST SHUT UP!

Spiral: @_@

Jimmy: _

Spiral: OK, I think we could cut to a break round about here, join us after the commercials

^_^


	2. Carl and Sheen

Spiral: Hi! Welcome back everybody! (audience is silent)

Spiral: With us now are Jimmy's best friends, Carl and Sheen, hi Carl and Sheen, welcome to the show.

Sheen: Ultralord says HELLO! *waves an Ultralord doll in front of the camera*

(everyone in audience starts cheering)

Carl: Umm… Hi… *whispers behind hand to Spiral* You know… I get kinda nervous in front of cameras…

Spiral: ^_^; That's OK, just pretend they aren't there.

Sheen: Yeah Carl, you can just pretend it's another one of Jimmy's stupid inventions.

Carl: Oh… OK… Do we get to see any Lamas on this show?

Sheen: Carl, stop being such a dufus- we're not going to the petting zoo til TOMORROW.

Carl: Oh yeah…

Spiral: ^_^; OK, perhaps some time today we should get round to asking some questions-

Sheen: Do my feet smell bad?

Carl: Do we get pizza after the-

Sheen: What does the word interrupt mean?

Spiral: Guys-

Sheen: Do you want to see my Ultralord beach towel-

Spiral: GUYS! @_@

(Carl and Sheen stare at her)

Spiral: This is an interview- _I_ ask the questions, not you.

Sheen: Why?

Spiral: @_@

Carl: Umm… Sheen, perhaps we should let this weird person ask us some questions…

Spiral: Thank you, OK, first question-

Carl: Wow Sheen! That's a great bath towel!

Sheen: Hey- it's a BEACH towel, but thanks, it a special edition with a screenshot from episode number-

Spiral: GUYS! _

Sheen: What? Gees, chill out lady.

Carl: Yeah, here, do you want to try one of my "chill out" pills?

*holds out jar*

Spiral: ^_^; I'll pass on that one thanks…

Spiral: Anyway, first question: OK, I assume that you know that your lives are on show… In a television series and a movie… and possibly a second?

Carl: Yeah…

Sheen: Like yeah, we're not stupid or nothing.

Spiral: So I was wondering, are the episodes scripted, or do cameras just follow you round a lot?

Carl: Well… *sees camera* Hi Jimmy's useless invention!

Sheen: Well, if there was a script I never read it, and neither did Ultralord! *pulls out an Ultralord figure*

Spiral: So are you really like how you appear on camera?

Carl: I don't really like cameras, so I always act stupid and- *catches sight of camera* Ah! *screams* *hides under Sheen's Ultralord towel*

Sheen: Stop being such a wuss Carl, it's just a camera! *Pokes camera lens*

Cameraman: Hey! *Glares at Spiral*

Spiral: That… Wasn't my fault… Anyway, what do you think about… Cindy and Libby?

Sheen: she is cooooooooooooooooooooooool! Almost as great as Ultralord!

Spiral: Who is?

Sheen: My queen Libby! 

Carl: You know, sometime I think that maybe you just have a really small, tiny crush on Libby.

Sheen: *blushing* NEVER! 

Carl: Oh, I guess not then, sorry.

Sheen: That's OK Carl, Ultralord forgives you!

Spiral: OK, what about Cindy?

Sheen: Oh, Jimmy loooooooooooooooves her.

Spiral: Really?

Sheen: Yeah, Ultralord told me so!

Carl: And he has loads of pictures of her.

Sheen: Yeah, but he only uses them to test out his girl-eating plant.

Carl: Yeah, well he knows it works, so why does he still have the pictures?

Sheen: I dunno, let's ask Ultralord! *pulls out a ball with Ultralord on it*

Sheen : Does Jimmy love Cindy? *throws the ball in the air*

*doesn't catch it*

*Carl picks it up*

Carl: It says: all signs point to yes.

Sheen: Jimmy got a girlfriend!

Spiral: yeah, but there are different kinds of love…

Sheen: Shut up girly, we're trying to find something to laugh at! *Pouts* Spoilsport

Spiral: Sowwy…

Sheen: *picks up the ball* OK then, does Jimmy want Cindy to be his girlfriend?

*throws the ball in the air*

*catches*

Sheen: Answer unclear, ask again later

(a few seconds pass)

Carl: Do you think it's later enough yet?

Sheen: Does Jimmy want Cindy to be his girlfriend?

*throws ball*

*hits Spiral on head* 

Spiral: _

Spiral: Undoubtedly.

Carl: Undoutbaballyally what?

Spiral: Answer to Sheen's question: Undoubtedly.

Sheen: Oh cool! Ha! Now Jimmy DOES have a girlfriend!

Spiral: You know, I don't really think-

Sheen: I've got it all figured out, I'LL be the Best man, and YOU can be maid of honour, see, that's completely fair.

Carl: Why do _I_ have to be the maid of honour?

Sheen: Because, YOU would look really great in a pink puffy dress, with loads of frills, and loads of pouch thingies…

Carl: Hey yeah… But who would be that religious guy?

Sheen: the religious guy?

Carl: The guy that talks for ages and then says: you may kiss the bride, and then they try to eat each other's faces.

Sheen: Oh, HIM, that's gonna be Ultralord.

Carl: Do you really think that Jimmy will let Ultralord be the religious guy that joins him and Cindy in holy matararararararamony?

Sheen: Who's the best man? 

Carl: You are-

Sheen: So who gets the first say.

Carl: I don't think it works like-

Spiral: ^_^; OK, now can we stop taking about Jimmy and Cindy's wedding?

Sheen: Ph! You're just jealous cuz you're not invited.

Spiral: Aww… 

Sheen: Aww, don't be sad- you can come if you want.

Spiral: YaY! Hug!

Sheen: *hugs*

Spiral: YaY!

Spiral: OK, now is probably a good time to cut to a commercial, cuz I can't think of anything else worth saying. Join us again after the break.

^_^ 


	3. Libby

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue

Spiral: Hey! Welcome back! With us now is… Libby! (audience goes mad, lots of whistling)

Libby: *shy wave* Hi everyone…

(audience still cheering)

Spiral: If we could- if you could just-

(audience cheers even louder)

Spiral: ¬_¬

Spiral: SHUT THE @!#& UP!

(everyone silent)

Spiral: OK, sorry about that, had to get you to calm down though.

Spiral: anyway, with us now is Libby, star of Jimmy Neutron (cheering) ¬_¬ I KNEW I shouldn't have said that…

Libby: OK calm down girlfriend! Mellow!

Spiral: *deep breaths* OK… I'll calm…

Spiral: OK, Libby, first question, what the HELL is going on with you and Sheen?

Libby: Me and Sheen? I don't know what you mean girlfriend!

Spiral: Suuuuuuuuuuure you don't ^_~

Libby: Girlfriend…?

Spiral: We've already interviewed Jimmy… And Carl and Sheen… 

Libby: OK, I follow so far girlfriend!

Spiral: We asked Carl and Sheen what they thought of you and Cindy…

Libby: what they been saying about me and my girlfriend? If it's anything bad, they gonna get a slap.

Spiral: ^_^; Well, that really depends what you consider "bad"

Libby: What did they say?

Spiral: Well…

Libby: Tell me! *looks scary and holds up fist*

Spiral: Eek! OK, but don't shoot the messenger.

Well, Sheen says he liked you almost as much as Ultralord…

Libby: Only almost as much as?! Boy, he is gonna get one big slap when I get outta here! Sometimes I really think he could be gay…

Spiral: HUH?!

Libby: *crying* He'd always chose Ultralord over me, and I'm his girlfriend…

Spiral: You are?! 

Libby: oops… Perhaps you haven't seen the third movie yet…

Spiral: The thir- 

Libby: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Spiral: Aww… *pulls out big tub of chocolate ice cream* Here girlfriend.

Libby: *sniff* Thanks girlfriend… Umm… Can I have a spoon?

Spiral: ^_^; Knew I'd forgotten something…

*someone off stage throws a spoon. It hits Spiral on the head*

Spiral: @_@ Why do things keep hitting me on the head?

Libby: *takes spoon*

Libby: Turn around…

Spiral: *turns around* 

Libby: *takes a sign off Spiral's back* OK girlfriend, I found your problem- you had this stuck on your back. *holds up sign saying: frow fings @ me*

Spiral: Hmm… I can't imagine when that could have happened… *thinks back to Sheen hugging her*

Spiral: O.o Oops.

Libby: oops what?

Spiral: Nothing… Anyway, perhaps we should ask some more questions before everyone decides to disappear and leave me rambling on my own. Kinda like that.

Spiral: So… Umm… Yeah, another thing Carl and you-know-who mentioned was that Jimmy and Cindy liked each other- they started planning their wedding…

Libby: Oh really?

Spiral: Yeah, you-know-who was best man, and Carl was maid of honour.

Libby: ^_^; Cindy aint gonna like THAT.

Spiral: Hmm… So what do you think?

Libby: Huh?

Spiral: what do you think about Jimmy and Cindy?

Libby: Oh! Well, Cindy's always like: I so don't like Jimmy, and I'm like: you so do!

Spiral: right… So you think they DO like each other?

Libby: What are you? Nuts? They obviously LOVE each other… And they do make a kinda cute couple really… But my Cindy only deserves the best!

Spiral: *nods head* *pretends to know what Libby's talking about*

Libby: But Cindy doesn't think Jimmy likes her, so she won't tell him. I mean, I think it's pretty dang obvious that Jimmy likes her too- (audience starts cheering and someone holds up a poster with a picture of Cindy in a wedding dress with the caption: Cindy Neutron underneath)

Libby: WOW! Cindy looks so great like that!

Spiral: Hmm… She does, yeah, anyway another question: in fact… Why don't we take some questions from the audience? OK… *points at some random member of the audience*

R.M.O.T.A: Yeah, hi mom! I'm on the telly! *waves madly at camera*  
Spiral: ¬_¬ *points at some OTHER random member of the audience*

R.M.O.T.A: OK, hi Libby, hi Spiral, Libby, I was wondering, do you still have that Ultralord figure Sheen gave you on Valentine's day? 

Audience: awww!

Libby: *nudges bag under chair with foot* No way! That thing was disgusting!

Spiral: Hey, can I have some of this ice cream please?

Libby: sure girlfriend!

Spiral: Thanks ^_^ *points at some other random member of the audience*

S.O.R.M.O.T.A: Um… Yeah, uh, Libby, do you act differently around cameras?

Libby: Well, I don't really notice them- at school, the camera men usually hide inside bins, or behind the mirrors in the toilets, or in the toilet roll tube…

Spiral: HUH?!

Libby: so it's kinda like the school CCTV cameras really…

Spiral: How do they hide in a small cardboard tube? Just out of interest.

Libby: You REALLY don't want to know…

Spiral: I really do…

Libby: *looks scary and shakes fist* NO YOU DON'T

Spiral: *gulp* Yes Ma'am.

Libby: *points at ANOTHER random member of the audience*

A.R.M.O.T.A: Yeah, hi and all that, hi spiky-

Spiral: it's SPIRAL _

A.R.M.O.T.A: Hi Libby, my question is, do you think that Cindy and Jimmy will get together?

Libby: *starts to speak*

A.R.M.O.T.A: We know that you think they like each other, but do you think either one of them will get the courage to tell the other how they really feel?

Join us after these messages.

^_~ 


	4. Cindy

OK, before I start the next interview- I just wanna say thanks to: *takes deep breath* ahhelga, aydarosio, Princess Plankton, stevetheloser, Cindy Neutron and fanjimmy for reviewing- you guys rock.

Sorry for not updating- I… Um… *tries to think of a good excuse* I know, I got kidnapped by a robot named… Umm… Bonder, right, and he took me 1000 years into the future, where I worked as a delivery girl, with Fly, Keela, Voidberg, Lamy, Flermes, Bonder and Prof. Farmsworm… OK, I get the feeling that I'm not fooling anyone, so I'll just get on with… Umm.. Oh yeah, the interview ^_^; Sorry… Short memory…

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Jimmy Neutron, but some day- some day I will! You'll see- Muahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! *gets dragged off in a straight jacket*

Spiral: Hey everyone, welcome back, thanks for joining us again. With us now is… Cindy!

(audience cheers)

Cindy: Hi!

Spiral: Hi Cindy, welcome to the show, glad you could make it.

Cindy: Oh, it was no trouble… *Smiles at camera*

Spiral: *clears throat*

Cindy: Sorry…

Spiral: No problemo, anyway, first question, the book you're always writing in, is that a diary of some sort? Or is it a book of poetry dedicated to… Someone.

Cindy: _ It's not a book of poetry! But yes, it IS a diary, and NO ONE is allowed to read it.

Spiral: Can I see it?

Cindy: no.

Spiral: Damn… Ah well, worth asking… Next question, what do you think is going on with Libby and Sheen, just out of curiosity… 

Cindy: Well, I'm guessing you haven't seen the third movie yet- if you had, you'd know, trust me.

Spiral: Yah, Libby mentioned the Third Movie, can you tell us what happens?

Cindy: Stuff.

Spiral: Huh?

Cindy: Stuff happens…

Spiral: Well, yah, but what kind of "stuff"?

Cindy: If I told you that we wouldn't make any money when the movie went out.

Spiral: Well can you give us a hint?

Cindy: OK, yeah, Jimmy completely messes up, Libby and Sheen get locked in a room together for a few days, Carl gets locked in a petting zoo with llamas, and I end up wearing purple flurp and Jimmy's coat.

Spiral: ^_^; That sounds… Interesting…

Cindy: Ha! Yeah… 

*Awkward silence*

Spiral: So, I don't wanna offend you or anything, but what is it that's so great about Nick?

Cindy: It's just that he's so dreeeeeeeeeamy and cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute and big and strong-

Spiral: And out of reach…

Cindy: _ He is NOT out of reach- I have a VERY good chance of getting together with him- who asked you anyway.

Spiral: No one, no one, but don't you think you could go for someone… Else?

Cindy: and who, exactly, is "someone else"?

Spiral: *mock thoughtfulness* Hmm, I wonder… Who could Cindy have a crush on… Hmm…

Cindy: And before you say Nerdtron-

Spiral: Ah, just what I was thinking, you took the words right out of my mouth.

Cindy: Huh?

Spiral: You just ADMITTED that you have a crush on Jimmy.

Cindy: No I DIDN'T!

Spiral: Yes you DID!

Cindy: DID NOT!

Spiral: DID SO!

Cindy: DID NOT!

Spiral: DID SO!

Cindy: DID NOT!

Spiral: If you don't like him then why are you getting so worked up?

Cindy: I'M NOT GETTING WORKED UP GOD DAMNIT!

Spiral: O.O; I seem to have touched a nerve…

*awkward silence*

Spiral: Anyway… You know the time when Jimmy and Co. started up that band for the talent contest…

Cindy: Yeah…

Spiral: How DID you and Libby learn to dance like that?

Cindy: Well, I've been sent to military camp every summer since I was two, and I thought, heck, military training, dancing, can't be that different, so I just tried it… 

Spiral: And how did it go?

Cindy: Well… At the time, I was wearing some heavy boots, and… I kinda put my foot through the floor of the school auditorium's stage…

Spiral: O.O;

Cindy: *laughing madly* It was soooo funny when the drama teacher came in- he screamed in this really high pitched voice and started crying, right, and then he pulled out a pink flowery handkerchief to wipe away the tears *breaks down laughing*

Spiral: O…K…

Cindy: Hey! I'm not done yet!

Spiral: Oh… Sorry…

Cindy: *Laugh* Anyway, right, he had just got out this flower thing, when his class of sixth graders walked in! They all started laughing, and she shouted at them for being so inconsiderate, and not caring about how hurt he was… *breaks down laughing*

Spiral: Done?

Cindy: No… OK, so then, he starts his drama class, and it's all about loud noises for some stupid reason, so this gothic girl with really heavy metal boots, starts stamping across the stage and puts ANOTHER hole in it, only this time it was BIGGER! *breaks down laughing*

Cindy: So, he told me and this girl to stay behind, after school, so we did, and we spent the whole time watching him talk on the phone to his mom, and crying, with the pink flowery handkerchief! *Breaks down laughing*

Minute later…

Cindy: OK, I'm done now…

Spiral: O.O; O…K… That was… Different… Anyway, perhaps another question… 

Cindy: OK, but first, can I have a drink please?

Spiral: Sure ^_^ *throws can of Purple Flurp*

Cindy: Thank you *opens can at arm's length*

Spiral: Hey wa- *gets soaked by Purple Flurp* _

Cindy: Oops. Sorry… *giggles*

Spiral: Grr…OK, next question, why do you constantly call Jimmy names and whatever? Is it because you really hate him?

Cindy: I do NOT feel obliged to answer that

Spiral: Or is it… That really you like him… And you just want his attention…

Cindy: I've had just about enough of this *throws can of Purple Flurp at Spiral*

*walks up to camera*

*puts hand on camera lens*

*jerks it violently to the right*

*viewers see Cindy storming off the right side of the stage*

Spiral: O.O *covered in Purple Flurp*

*Interviewee has just walked out on the interview*

Spiral: O.O; We'll… Be… Right… Back… *runs off the left side of the stage*

*falls over in the process of doing so*

*slides across the floor and stops in view of the camera*

*cuts to commercials*


	5. Libby Continued

Howdy doo da day! Spiral here for another interview, and this time I actually have some sort of excuse for not updating in ages- My monitor went bye bye on me, and faded out every 6 seconds, for a while, til I got a new one.

Anyway, Got another interview for you right here, and I wanna say thanks to everyone that reviews -

Spiral: HEY EVERYBODY! We're back from our... Extended vacation… Heh heh… Our show didn't get cancelled- of course not…

Spiral: Anywho, with my now is Libby, for the continuation of the interview we started… A long time ago, so, Libby what you been up to over the past however long it's been?

Libby: Oh, you know, this and that girlfriend- I just got the new Mardy Dudes CD!

Spiral: O.O How nice for you.

Libby: Hey girlfriend! Don't knock it til you've heard it. ( puts headphone in Spiral's ear )

Spiral: That's AWFUL how can you listen to that?!

Libby: Hey girlfriend, I don't like you dissing my Mardy Dudes CD- if you got a problem with that, you take it up with ME.

Spiral: O.O Wow… It really IS easy to wind her up.

Libby: What?!

Spiral: Anyway, the last question asked to you was: do you think Cindy and Jimmy will ever actually get together, or do you think they'll just hide their feelings?

Libby: Yeah yeah! ( waving arms in air in time to the music ) one add seven is you and me! Four and nine to the power of nine is me multiplied by yooooooooou.

Spiral: O.O

Libby: Sorry girl, d'you say something?

Spiral: Umm.. No, of course not, anyway, we asked this to Cindy… WHAT is so great about Nick?

Libby: ( beads of sweat running down her face ) He's so… Umm… ( tries to read something that was written on her hand before she came on stage, but has now been washed off by sweat ) Screeeeaaamu and ( squinting ) Parachuuuuuuuute, and he wears a wig, and a thong!

Spiral: You know, I'm not gonna ask how you found that out…

Libby: Hey! It was CINDY who told me what to say and wrote it on my hand! ( holds up hand and all to be seen in a blur of ink )

Spiral: And so… WHY was Cindy telling you what to say?

Libby: Oh crap… ( more beads of sweat ) I mean, she didn't TELL me, she just… Just… Helped me think of answers to the questions you asked her! Yeah, that's right! 

Spiral: And… Why did Cindy think that I would ask you the same questions as I asked her?

Libby: How should I know, you ask her in her next interview.

Spiral: OK I will do.

Libby: Fine by me girlfriend! ( starts fanning herself with her CD case )

Spiral: OK… Interview… Right, OK Libby, boxers or briefs?

Libby: None, I prefer to feel a healthy breeze around my- Hey, wait, isn't that a question for… Oh I dunno… GUYS?

Spiral: O.O; Oops… Wrong card… ( see Spiral shuffling cards around in front of her ) Oh OK, here we go, Libby, do you think that maybe Carl has feelings for Cindy?

Libby: What?!

Spiral: Well, you know the day when you were running for class president, and you went round visiting houses, and you went to Carl's?

Libby: Eugh, yeah…

Spiral: Well, after you walked off, Cindy gave Carl a dollar, shook hands with him and winked…

Libby: O.O

Spiral: And then he said, with a big grin on his face, why are you winking at me? Do you like me?

Libby: O.O

Spiral: And Cindy said yes!

Libby: ( faints )

Spiral: Oops… I was only joking… Uh oh…

( Two paramedics run onto the stage and pick up Libby and put her on a stretcher )

( On the way out, one of the paramedics trips over a chair and is knocked out, so more paramedics are called )

( After ten minutes, all unconscious bodies have been removed from the stage )

Spiral: Perfect! Well, do we have anyone else ready for an interview?

( She looks to the side of the stage where a man wearing a headset and holding a clipboard is standing )

( Man shakes head )

Spiral: O.O OK, we seem to be having slight… Technical difficulties… please stay right here while I go and track down someone else to hold host- I mean- interview…


	6. Carl and Jimmy

Disclaimer: ( insert disclaimer here )

( See a dark stage, and a layer of smoke floats in around the ankles. Suddenly, a spotlight is turned on, and viewers see a dark shape. As the light brightens, slightly, viewers see that it is Spiral. Viewers also see Carl and Jimmy sitting in chairs on the stage )

Spiral: Greetings, mortals, and welcome to my show.

Carl: ( tries to whisper to Jimmy, but his microphone is too sensitive ) hey Jimmy, she sounds all differenty… Do you think there's something wrong?

Spiral: ( anime fall ) --;

Jimmy: No Carl, she was trying to build suspense… It just didn't work. In future, might I suggest that-

Spiral: No, we want to get this show finished TODAY if possible.

Jimmy: But really- it's a simple and quick-

Spiral: Not interested…

Jimmy: Fine.. ( sulks )

Spiral: So guys, welcome back, how you both been since last time?

Carl: Oh, I've been good- I went to the petting zoo, and I saw a little baby llama wearing a party hat with a streamer sticking out of its-

Spiral: And how have YOU been Jimmy?

Jimmy: ( muttering ) I've been fine..

Spiral: You don't sound so sure..

Carl: Oh, Jimmy's just in a bad mood cuz Sheen told Libby, who told Brittany ( sp? ) who told Nick, who told… ( ten minutes and a lot of names later ) who told Ms. Fowl, who told Cindy, that Jimmy's poem was about her.

Spiral: hey wait.. WHAT poem? Is there something you're not telling me?

Jimmy: ( Glares at Carl )

Carl: Umm… No.. ( looks from side to side nervously )

Spiral: Come on… You can tell me.

Carl: Well Jimmy, seeing as you said the poem isn't about Cindy, can't we just tell Spiral that it was a love po- oops..

Jimmy: ( blush )

Spiral: Jimmy… You wrote Cindy a LOVE poem?!

Jimmy: ( blushing even more ) NO! It wasn't about her!

Carl: Then who was it about Jim?

Jimmy: Shut up Carl, you've already caused more than enough trouble today..

Spiral: Who was it about Jimmy?

Jimmy: ( Shouting ) No-one, OK! I didn't write any love songs about Cindy!

Everyone in audience and Carl and Spiral: O.O

Jimmy: ( blushing more ) I mean poems…

Some random member of audience: Play the song!

Spiral and Carl together: Yeah, play the song!

Jimmy: I don't have a guitar ( smug grin, as if this settles the matter )

Spiral: Hold on… ( Walks off stage, and walks back two minutes later with an acoustic guitar )

Jimmy: I can only play my own instrument ( another smug grin )

Spiral: ( whistles ) Goddard! Guitar please! ( a replica of Jimmy's guitar appears in front of him )

Jimmy: ( slowly taking guitar ) But I want you to remember, this song ISN'T about Cindy…

Spiral: OK! ( crosses fingers behind back )

Jimmy: ( singing and strumming ):

I think I'm in love…

Love, it feels so strange to me,

Only took one person to make me see,

Very strange feelings came to me, Of my…

Enemy…

Young of heart and young of soul,

Only she can make me whole,

Unlike the rest, she is the best, and I think I love her…

Could she look any better?

I think the answer is no..

Nobody knows, what she does to me,

Do you think even she knows?

You think even she knows?

Spiral: ( writing down lyrics as Jimmy sings, it's a slow song )

Very good with creative arts

Only girl who stops heart,

Really she'll never know,

Tell her, one day, maybe I will,

Every day, I'm a slave to what she makes me feel,

Xtraordinarily...

Spiral: ( eyes widen as she reads the words down the left hand side of the paper vertically )

Young of heart and young of soul,

Only she can make me whole,

Unlike the rest, she is the best, and I think I love her…

Love, it feels so strange to me,

Only took one person to make me see,

Very strange feelings came to me, Of my…

Enemy…

Maybe one day, I'll tell you

Eternally I'll pay,

Tomorrow you'll laugh,

Obnoxiously too,

Of course, I still love you…

Jimmy: ( finishes playing and blushes, putting down guitar )

Carl: (wipes tears from his eyes ) That was beautiful Jim..

IN THE GREEN ROOM

Sheen: ( headphones on ) I thought Jimmy was a GENIUS! That poem SUCKED!

Cindy: Yah, well, even "geniuses" aren't good at everything…

Libby: ( also wrote down the first letter of each line of the song, and gasps ) Girlfriend!

Sheen: I'm not your girlfriend!

Libby: Yeah well, I wasn't talking to you girlfriend- boyfriend- friend- ( blushing ) eh whatever…

ON STAGE

Spiral: ¬¬ You know, if you read the lines of that poem vertically, down the left hand side, it reads: I love you Cindy Vortex you love me too…

Jimmy: Coincidence!

Carl: Hey Jim, why are you blushing? I thought you didn't like girls yet…

Jimmy: Well if YOU'RE allowed to like Cindy, I think I am too!

Spiral: WHAT?!

Carl: ( looking edgily from side to side ) I never said I liked Cindy!

Jimmy: Well neither did I!

Spiral: Actually, you just di-

Jimmy: SHUT UP!

Spiral: OO

IN THE GREEN ROOM

( Sheen and cindy were too busy arguing themselves to hear any of the argument going on on-stage )

Sheen: He is NOT a doll, he's an ACTION FIGURE!

Cindy: Same dif Doll Boy

Sheen: He is NOT a doll, he's an ACTION FIGURE!

Cindy: They're the same thing, Doll boy

( argument repeats itself )

Libby: ( just sitting with headphones on, mouth open, staring at the screen )

MORE ON THE MAYHEM AFTER THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK!


	7. Cindy and Sheen

Disclaimer: I really can't be bothered- go read someone else's… Or just one from a different chapter…

Spiral: Hey, and we're back! Jimmy and Carl have been safely removed and taken back to the green room, so with me now are Sheen and Cindy- Libby should be here too, but… Ah… She fainted at the end of the last interview… Sorry bout that… Anyways, welcome back guys.

Sheen: Hey Spiky!

Spiral: ( whispers to Sheen ) it's Spiral

Sheen: OK Spikal

Cindy and Spiral: O.O;

Spiral: So, how have you both been?

Cindy: Well, I've been-

Sheen: Myself and the oh so mighty Ultralord have both been fine!

Spiral: I was actually talking about you and Cindy

Sheen: What? Cindy isn't a guy- she's much worse than that- she's not even human- she's- SHE'S

Cindy: A girl

Sheen: Aaaaah! She said the G word! She said the G word! Aaaaaaaaah! ( Runs off stage screaming )

Spiral: O.O;

Cindy: O.O;

Spiral: Does… He have split personalities?

Cindy: Well, he does now…

Spiral: What did you to him?

Cindy: Oh nothing… ( said very quickly ) except-maybe-hit-him-on-the-head-with-his-doll-a-few-times… ( innocent whistle )

Spiral: O.O; Oooooooooookaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay… ( pulls chair slightly away from Cindy's )

Spiral: Anywho, the interview, OK, first off- WHY were you writing answers to questions on Libby's hand?!

Cindy: O.O Because… Sometimes… Libby… ( looks quickly around the studio ) Because sometimes Libby gets camera-shy.

Spiral: Really? I wouldn't have noticed, she's been fine with me…

( Sheen walks back onto the stage )

Spiral: Hey Sheen, pull up a chair

Sheen: ( drags and extra chair up the interview area- there is already a spare one there )

Cindy and Spiral: ?

Sheen: ( walks off stage and comes back a few seconds later with a life-sized Ultralord doll, and sits it in the extra chair )

Cindy: Oh great, Ultrafreak decided to bring along his new biggest dolly- wolly

Sheen: He's not a DOLL he's an ACTION FIGURE!

Cindy: Doll

Sheen: ACTION FIGURE!

Cindy: DOLL!

Sheen: ACTION FIGURE!

Spiral: ( rolls eyes )

Sheen: Action figure times a bazillion!

Cindy: Oh yeah, well, DOLL TIMES INFINITY!

Spiral: OH MY GOD! JIMMY AND LIBBY ARE KISSING OVER THERE!

( Cindy and Sheen stop arguing and stare in the direction of Spiral's pointing finger )

Sheen: Pfft! That's not Jimmy and Libby, it's Carl and Ms. Fowl… ( eyes widen ) CARL AND MS. FOWL!

Ms. Fowl: I was meaning to tell you all Braaaaaaaaawk!

Carl: Oh yeah, Sheen, I WAS going to tell you but… ( mumbles something and then stops talking )

Spiral: But… Carl, I thought you fancied Cindy…

Cindy: WHAT?!

Carl: Well, I KINDA did, but then I realised that girls are icky! What I needed was a woman!

( Cindy, Sheen and Spiral, all sitting with eyes and mouths wide open )

( All at once )

Sheen: Since when is Ms. Fowl a WOMAN?

Cindy: How do you KNOW Ms. Fowl's a woman?

Spiral: OMG! Does my hair really look like that from the back?

Carl: Well, it was nice seeing you all, I'm just gonna show myself out… ( he and Ms. Fowl walk off the stage holding hands )

Cindy and Sheen: ( mouths and eyes open wide )

Spiral: ( uses two mirrors to see what her hair looks like from the back )

Cindy and Sheen: ( still staring )

Spiral: ( starts braiding hair and humming the JN theme song- BFS version )

Sheen: ( regains "normality" and backs slowly away from Spiral )

Sheen: ( whispers in an overloud voice ) Psst! Cindy! Spikal is scaring me- I think she might try and eat you in a minute, or, or, try and strangle you with her hair, so that's why she's making it go all weirdy…

Spiral: ( glares at Sheen ) WHAT did you say about my hair?

Sheen: Oops… I shouldn't have said that… IT WAS CINDY! ( points at Cindy and runs off stage )

Cindy: It wasn't me!

Spiral: I know it wasn't you- I might be stupid, but I'm not blind or the other one…

Cindy: Deaf?

Spiral: Sure, why not?

Cindy: Aren't you supposed to be asking me questions?

Spiral: Probably…

Cindy: So… Why aren't you?

Spiral: OOOOOOH… That was an invitation to ask a question… I get it now…

Cindy: ( Rolls eyes )

Spiral: So come on, tell us all, put us out of our misery… There is one question that every Jimmy Neutron fan in the universe wants to know the answer to… Now, we all know what the answer is anyway , but I want to ask you, so we hear it from you…

Cindy: ( nervously looks around as if she can tell what's coming next )

Spiral: Cindy, do you… Wear boxers or briefs?

Cindy: ( laugh of relief ) Oh, what I wear is none of your business…

Spiral: Hey- every Jimmy Neutron fan in the world wanted to-

Cindy: why is it ALWAYS "Jimmy Neutron fan" why is it never "Cindy Vortex fan"?! ( getting mad )

Spiral: O.O

Cindy: Well?!

Spiral: Well… The show's called: the Adventures Of Jimmy Neutron Boy Genius, so we call anyone who likes the show Jimmy Neutron fans..

Cindy: OK, I've been on some sites, and I've come across something called j/c… What is that?

Spiral: O.O; Oh crap…Have you never… Been into one of the sections and read what it's about?

Cindy: No…

Spiral: Why not?

Cindy: Because my computer has this internet security package, which blocks out swear words or sexual language etc. etc. so all I see on these pages are the words Jimmy and Cindy… And loads of blanked out words…

Spiral: What site were you on?

Cindy: I dunno, something like …

Spiral: Never heard of it! crosses fingers behind back

Cindy: So what IS J/C? If I didn't know any better, I would think that you would think that there is actually something going on between my and Jimmy, which there most certainly ISN'T

Spiral: OK, question- when did you start calling him Jimmy? First date? Second?

Cindy: As if I'd ever date dorktron!

Spiral: Oh come on, we all know you like him really…

Cindy: No I don't!

Spiral: then I guess you won't mind if we hook you up to a lie detector to see if you're telling the truth then…

Cindy: ( looks nervously at the heart monitor being rolled onto the stage by a stage assistant ) Of course not- why would I?

Spiral: ( ties/ cello-tapes/ welds/ nails/otherwise attaches/ inserts wires to/on Cindy ) You OK there Cindy?

Cindy: I have a wire with sharp metal at the end sticking up my nose!

Spiral: Yah, that's normal

( Sheen walks over to the camera man to watch the show )

Spiral: ( hooks the lie detector up to a big screen )

Cindy: What did you do that for, Spiky?

Spiral: a) it's Spiral, and 2) It's so everyone in the audience can see your heart beat

Cindy: And WHY would the audience want to see my heartbeat?

Spiral: ( rolls eyes ) So we can tell if you're lying, I thought you were a genius?

Cindy: I am!

( Cindy's heart beat thingy appears on the screen with a big spike )

Spiral: You know, that could indicate you aren't telling the truth…

Cindy: Yes I AM!

Spiral: And another spike… So Cindy, do you like Jimmy Neutron really?

Cindy: NO!

( Big spike )

Spiral: ( raises eyebrows )

Cindy: OK, LIKE, but nothing more than that!

Spiral: Hey, lookee guys- there's another big spike!

Cindy: THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE REALLY WINDING ME UP!

Spiral: Oh, Suuuuuuuuuuure it is…

Cindy: ( rips all the wires off/ out of herself ) THAT'S IT! I'M FED UP OF THIS! I'M NOT HAVING ANOTHER INTERVIEW WITH YOU! ESPECIALLY NOT ON MY OWN!

Spiral: you weren't on your own, Sheen was here too… Well… He was SUPPOSED to be here… Where is he now anyway?

Sheen: ( takes running jump onto the stage ) (doesn't make it and falls off )

Spiral: Oh… There he is… Hey Sheen!

Sheen: Hey Spikal!

Spiral: ¬.¬

Cindy: ( storms off stage )

Sheen: I think it must be the time of the month for her… Hey Spikal, what does "time of the month" mean anyway? People always say it when someone gets really worked up… Mostly girls… I think Jimmy must be on his "time of the month" a lot, cuz he gets worked up really easily…

Spiral: O.O;

Sheen: What does it mean?

Spiral: ( doesn't say anything for a minute ) OK! That's all the time we have for today! Join us next time! Seeya! ( runs off stage to hide from Sheen )


End file.
